Ok, so. The menu this week is going to be pretty scarce. We're never positive what Aaron's schedule is going to be like and on top of that, Emmy is going to Vacation Bible School this week in the evenings. I'm pretty sure our schedule will be completely conflicting, so my plan is to throw dinners together on the fly. Is this a bad plan? Yes it is. But, I know for sure that I've got the groceries for the following: Chicken Nuggets Peanut Butter and Jelly Hot Dogs Grilled Cheese Macaroni and Cheese Turkey and Cheese Get the idea? Yeah. It's going to be one of those weeks. Don't judge. This is real life folks. Even I'm allowed a menu like this once in a while. If we all make it through this week alive and with minor injuries and a shred of sanity, then I'll have considered it a success. Ok, so onto this verse of the week. I used it in a blog post this last week, but I felt that it was going to be appropriate for this long week ahead. It will serve as a reminder to me to "just keep swimming". Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap the harvest if we do not give up. - Galatians 6:9
Is this going to be a crazy week for you, too? If so, remember to keep going. It won't be easy. You might not get immediate results, or no results at all, but keep going. Because it's the right thing to do. And it's the best. Happy Monday!
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I don't know if I've ever mentioned this, but I'm a HUGE music person. I enjoy pretty much all types of music.* I'm the person who keeps the radio on scan and can listen to blue grass and rap all within a 5 min time span. Recently though, I've been listen to lots of Veggies Tales Worship. Anyway, I wanted to start a new Sunday post dedicated to a particular song that's really been speaking to me in the past week. *Jazz is the exception. I know, I know. I just have never been able to enjoy it. It confuses me! This week is a song that I've been listening to almost on repeat for weeks and weeks now. A few months ago I was on a mommy break, wandering through our local christian book store and I meandered into the music section. I don't normally buy CD's because I'm a Pandora/regular car radio type person. But, I had heard a song I loved on regular radio by Meredith Andrews. Then, I heard another song off her new album on Pandora. I decided that if I've heard 2 songs that I can't get enough of, then I'm sure the whole CD is excellent. It happened to be on sale that night, so I grabbed it. And I was right. There isn't one song that I couldn't listen to over and over again. Meredith, her husband, and a writer friend wrote most of the album and it comes from such a worshipful, honest place. Meredith and her husband are co worship leaders at Harvest Bible Chapel in Chicago. Anyways, the CD is called Worth It All, and it's awesome. Plus, she's like my vocal range soul mate, and her stuff is incredibly easy for me to sing, so that's a plus. [For my church folks, she's the one who wrote the song I sang in church a few months ago.] The song is called Start With Me. And seriously, it's been the cry of my heart for weeks now. Start with me God. Start revival with me. Start loving people through me. I can't really do the song justice so I'll post the lyrics and a YouTube video with the song for you.... You are air the desperate longs
Water falling on the sand Silence to an angry storm Sight to a blind man You're still the God of miracles So if You're gonna move again The would You move in me? Move in me You're the beat to a broken heart Bread for a hungry crowd One word from Your voice rings out And the dead throw the grave clothes down Cause You're still the God of the empty tomb The one who came alive again So come alive in me Come alive in me Come alive in me Come alive in me (Chorus) My life is an empty cup Fill it up, fill it up! I wanna hear every rescued heart cry You're enough, You're enough! Break what needs breaking 'Til You're all we see And start with me, start with me Whose arms hold the fatherless? Whose voice do they hear? Who sits with the prisoner And stands for the one who fear? You're still the God of what is just And You're still the God who loves So would You love through me Love through me yeah Come and love through me Would You love through me, yeah Chorus Your kingdom come Your will be done Lord let it be Let it start with me, start with me Ok, so there is your Sunday's Song. There's a pretty good chance next week's song might come from this album as well, because it's just that good! Happy Sunday! Over the last few months as Aaron and I have been praying about and preparing for a possible new chapter in our lives, I've come face to face with a spiritual immaturity that I didn't even know I had. And maybe that's not the right words for it, maybe problem is the right word, but that doesn't change the issue. I'm a people pleaser. I always have been. No, scratch that. It has increased 10 fold in my 2nd decade of life. For some reason, my 20's has been about doing and being what I thought every other person in life wanted and expected of me. My marriage had to be what others expected. I had to have perfect babies and raise them how everyone else says I should. I have to say all the right things, do all the right things, and never leave my house with a hair out of place. And I most certainly cannot come to God a total mess. And the funny thing is... the last 10 years of my life have been the total opposite. Behind the closed doors of our home there has been raging chaos. Marital chaos, parenting chaos, chaos in our ministry, and internal and spiritual chaos inside myself. A few months ago I had a total God moment. I was praying about something and suddenly it dawned on me- all I had ever done was try and make myself good enough for God. I had no concept of what grace was. I'd grown up in the church and the term was familiar and rolled off my tongue easily, but I certainly don't understand it and don't know how it applies to my life. Not long after that I came across a book called Christ In the Chaos: How the Gospel Changes Motherhood. In the books she was saying things like... Grace is God's declaration to a believer that she can never disappoint him...My God will never say, "You've done this a thousand times, and I'm through with you. "I have been adopted into the family of God and given the perfect righteousness of Jesus, so God looks at me, and says, "That's her! That's my daughter. Isn't she so beautiful and perfect?" Grace tells me I can royally mess things up and am still loved. What?! That blew my mind. It was then that I realized that me trying to be a perfectionist in my relationship with God meant nothing. God won't be disappointed or upset with me when I mess up. He's happy with me when I do Godly Christlike things. And trying to maintain a fake "perfect" lifestyle isn't one of those Godly things. Ok, so hear me on this one... does this mean I suddenly understand the depths of God's love and the exact implications of God's grace in my life? Absolutely not. I'm just starting to understand a fraction of all of this. Does it mean that I'm free of the burden of the perfectionist lifestyle and live every day to it's fullest God pleasing potential? Nope. But it's getting easier. One of my favorite songs of all time is In Christ Alone. It's funny how was you grow/change/age, songs that you've known for a long time suddenly take on new meanings and new truths stick out to you. I had this song stuck in my head a few weeks ago and as I was humming it, suddenly I realized the sweet truth of the 2nd verse. Something I'd never thought about before.... What love and peace I've experienced as God has stilled my fears about not being good enough and as I've stopped trying so hard to be good enough for him to love me. If you experience the same feelings and frustrations, I urge you to ask God to deepen your understanding of his love and grace. What freedom there is in knowing. (And I'm just grazing the surface!)
Here are some pictures of how we spent our 4th of July! We went to a local parade and festival, then drove a ways to go to another fireworks display. It was a fun day and the girls loved the parade and fireworks even though they didn't make it all the way through the display! They were both asleep before it was over! I didn't get any pictures at the fireworks. It was raining when we got there, so we kind of got our places and stayed put. I also didn't get any family pictures which I wish I'd thought of. Oh well. We had a good time and the girls really enjoyed the day! Love the 4th of July!
I hope your day was was enjoyable as well! When Aaron and I where in the depths of our marriage being in shambles and teetering on the edge of decisions that we felt we needed to make, I felt the Lord leading me to confide in one specific lady at church. I knew that she had some experience in her own life making hard decisions regarding marriage and she was also the co leader of our DivoreCare Ministry at church. If she was shocked at some of my revelations about the state of our marriage, she didn't show it. She prayed with me, checked up on me, encouraged me, and honestly, she gave me the greatest advice anyone could have ever given... Do the hard stuff. I groaned inwardly when she said it. I knew she was right, but at the time, I had no faith that doing just that would fix my marriage. A few weeks later when we got into counseling, imagine my surprise (not really) when our counselor told us the exact same thing. It might be hard. It might be ugly. It might feel weird or awkward, but do the hard stuff. That advice/direction was the absolute catalyst to starting the healing in our marriage. But, oddly enough, this blog isn't about my marriage. It's about all the other area's of my life that I need to apply that same advice. Parenting. It's easy to be a passive participant in my children's life. It's easy to choose the easy road out with discipline. But it's not the best. Finances. It's easy to spend money on things we don't need. It's easy to use our debit card instead of sticking 100% to our cash budget. It's easy to ignore the budget. But it isn't the best. Keeping my house clean. It's easy to pile up junk and sweep things under the rug (figuratively) until I can't stand the mess anymore. It's easy to let the dishes and laundry sit. But it isn't the best. Losing Weight. It's easy to eat that [pan] brownie. It's easy to watch tv or blog instead of exercising. It's easy to make excuses or tell myself this is how it will always be. But it isn't best. Maturing Spiritually. It's easy to stay in bed in the morning instead of getting up and spending some time with God. It's easy to say "Praying for you" and yet never utter a word about it to God. It's easy. It's easy. It's easy. But it's not the best. Galatians 6:9 says- Let us not tire in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Am I saying do the hard stuff so that eventually you'll reap the harvest? No. I'm saying do the hard stuff because it's what's right. And best. God expects nothing less than our best. He asks us to honor him in all we do. Over the last few days I've had to really ask myself- am I giving God my best and honoring him by the effort I'm giving in many area's of my life. The answer has been no. So, I'm back to that advice I was given months ago.... Do the hard stuff. It feels overwhelming. There are so many areas of my life that I'm coming in below the bar. So what now? 1. Ask God's forgiveness for not giving my best to Him. 2. Remember that God loves me. And I judge myself and my failures much differently than he does. He doesn't define me by my success or failures. Grace. This is a lesson on grace. 3. Set small, measurable goals in each area. I'm going to be intentional about taking some time to sit down and write out some goals that are attainable. I want to clean this part of my house x times a week. I want to go cash only for a whole week. I want to stick to my calories and exercise 3 times a week. I want to set aside 15 mins each day to pray for specific people. I've learned that setting extremely lofty goals sounds good, but it's rarely attainable and just perpetuates a sense of failure. 4. Just do it. I think Nike is really onto something with that. Just do it. It might be hard. It might be awkward. It might not seem fruitful immediately, but do it anyways. Because it's right. And it's what God wants. So my challenge to myself and you today is #1 be real about it. Everyone has areas to improve. It's ok. That's not bad. And #2 do the hard stuff. Just do it. You might realize the things you were avoiding become something you're very good at or you enjoy doing! Happy Wednesday!
Wow! What a crazy 2 weeks we've had. I intended on being back to the blog last week, but after we finished volunteering at the Nazarene General Assembly, we jumped in both feet into garage sale mode. We left late in the week to head up north to where the garage sale was with family and friends. We had great success with the garage sale, which I'm thankful for! Yesterday was the first day of doing nothing in almost 2 weeks and I spent the day trying to get my head back on straight and things organized. The postman hurt his back at work 2 weeks ago so he's been home on medical leave. He's seeing a doctor and physical therapist and hopefully will be able to return back to work tomorrow! It's been nice having him home and being able to spend time together as a family, but I know he's anxious to get back to the post office. Ok, so I planned my menu through Friday for this week. Tonight we are possibly going to eat dinner at the food court in the mall and heading to the Disney Store so the kids can each pick out a toy. We sold lots of their old toys at the garage sale, so we told them they could spend some of the money we made from them and get something new. But, we're in the throws of grandparent come down, so we're working on getting back to good behavior. So, the mall is dependent on making good choices on the kids part today. Monday- Green Beans, Sausage, and Potatoes Tuesday- Food Court @ the Mall. Probably Chick-fil-A. Wednesday- BBQ Pork Ribs. I love these. They are just small boneless ribs. I put them in the crock pot with a bit of water and cook until they are tender. Then I drain them, add bbq sauce, and cook them a few more minutes. YUM! Thursday- We're heading to a parade, festival, and fireworks for the 4th of July so we'll be taking a picnic dinner to eat while we're there. I'll probably just fix sandwiches. Friday- Brats. It's like a rule at our house that we have to eat ribs and brats the week of 4th of July. So, since it's just sandwiches on the actual holiday, we'll do brats today. I ge regular brats and we grill them. Verse of the Week I chose the verse of the week this week as a bit of a reminder to myself of all the things that I heard preached about at General Assembly 2 weeks ago. The church we belong to identifies themselves as a holiness denomination and it was good to hear some good preaching and teaching about what that means. But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.
- 1 Peter 3:9 Have a wonderful Tuesday! |
HEY, I'M JESSICA!
Christian. Wife. Mommy. Daughter. Pastor. Friend. Saved.Redeemed. Beloved.
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