Wow, it's been almost a month since I posted last. Time goes by so quickly. I've worked out a bit of a schedule and got some "blog office hours" ironed out. So, hopefully, soon I'll be able to get back to a normal posting routine. Anyways, I have a few minutes now and I wanted to put down a few thoughts I've had. Realizations, I guess. The last few months have been a roller coaster, to say the least. Change, change, and more change coming. We're still in the process of moving somewhere. Our lease will be up at our current home in a month, and we're moving somewhere. Just not quite sure where that might be yet. We've got plan A and plan B, we're just waiting and trusting as God opens doors in His time. I've admitted openly on this blog that I've got serious issues with the virtue of patience. It's probably one of the biggest spiritual issue I have. It's a battle I fight constantly. When something doesn't happen RIGHT NOW I start faltering in the area of trust. When I falter in trust, my hope starts slipping. Then doubt creeps in. But as I dig more and more into scripture and as I come to know God's character more and more I've realized something- God is still on his throne. My mantra has become... Yes, but we've lived. Over the last year, we've been through periods of weeks with, literally, pennies to our name. Sometimes less. Yet, we've made it through each and every time. Aaron's health has been compromised over and over through injuries and accidents, but the Lord has spared him from very serious injury each time. We've been surprised by things that have changed the course of our life, yet it's turned out to be a blessing. Why? Because God is still on his throne. I've learned not to be so short sighted. I know there is a bigger picture. I can't see it yet. I don't want to see it honestly. 10 years ago, had I know what lay ahead for us I probably would have opted out. But, I've learned that God is sovereign. That's a big word. Sometimes it can be kind of scary, especially if you haven't grown up in the church or don't know the "lingo". But, I've learned that it simply means that God is in control. Always. And because of that, He's never once led my family to ruin. He's never led me to ruin. Yes, there have been times of deep disappointment, times of loss or grief, and even a little humiliation. But because I'm realizing that nothing that happens to us takes away God's control and authority over my life, I'm living in less and less fear. Fear of the future, of where we'll live, where Aaron will work, how our bills will get paid. Because God loves me. Because He is good. Because He's in control. I've learned that I am a doubter. When I'm in the thick of things, my natural tendency is to doubt God instead of press into him and trust him even more. But, as life happens, I'm learning this lesson. So, I challenge you with this today- It's never too late to start learning something new about God. If you struggle with doubting Him, doubting his promises, living in fear, decide today to choose to believe. For me, sometimes it is a minute by minute thing. Some days are easier than others. Open your Bible and find a verse that helps you believe God and encourages you. Press into him and remember- God is still on the throne. Nothing you or anyone or anything else can change his control over your life.
Happy Monday!
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HEY, I'M JESSICA!
Christian. Wife. Mommy. Daughter. Pastor. Friend. Saved.Redeemed. Beloved.
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