The day off yesterday has thrown me. I woke up this morning in Monday mode. Thankfully, I remembered it was Tuesday and I'll be getting on with Tuesday things. Anyways, I wanted to share these with you, partly because I want the accountability, but also because I know there are probably other parents out there that can and should make parenting goals. I didn't start the year with the intention of setting specific goals in this area, but the Lord has really impressed them on me. So... here goes-
1. Stop Yelling. Yes, I'm a yeller. And now so are my kids. I've read so much about this topic and I know it's not a good form of communication with my children. Infact, it's not communication. It's just yelling. I even realized that the reason I yell is because I feel like I'm losing control of situation. But, I didn't see the need to change until it was staring me in the face. I heard Emmy start talking/sounding/yelling just like me. And I decided that was it. So, I've purposed to speak quietly when I'm upset instead of yell. It hasn't been easy and I've not been perfect, but when I sense the anger or out of control feeling building up, I've just prayed for help from the Holy Spirit to help me control my emotions and give me wisdom on how to handle the situation instead of yelling. 2. Encourage More. I want to be an encouraging parent. I want my kids to know that I love them and I approve of who they are and who they are becoming. I want them to know that I recognize things they do. And I want them to know that I love them, no matter what. So, I've decided I want to encourage them 5x's more than I discipline or correct. Some days this has proven to be REALLY hard. When it seems like they're just out to make me crazy or I'm in a bad mood, it forces me to look for the positives. And it's helped me to appreciate things about my girls that I haven't before. 3. Let them be kids and loosen up. Obviously, there is a time and place for everything, but at the appropriate time I just want to let my kids be kids. For so long I've worried about my children's behavior and over-corrected them when there really was no reason to. I wasn't letting them just be kids. When they aren't doing anything wrong or when they aren't hurting anyone or themselves, then just let them be. An example of this- Sunday we took the girls to a local McDonalds and let them eat and play in the play place. Emmy got up during lunch and moved to the 2 seater table next to us. Normally, I would have immediately corrected her and made her come back to our table, but I told myself she's not doing anything wrong, she's not hurting anyone, she's safe (still within a quick arms reach) and she's capable so just let her be. She was happy, I was happy she was happy, and it didn't turn into something it didn't need to be. 4. Pray for them more. I pray for my kids, but not faithfully in a earnest, praying God's will over them sort of way. Right now it's my job to lead them to the cross. It's my (ours- as in Aaron and I) job to introduce them to Jesus and teach them about who God is and what that means for their lives. We read bible stories with them, we do bible verses, we talk about God, but I'm not faithful enough to pray God's protection over their little hearts and minds. 5. Protect them. Everyone's probably like... well, of course you're supposed to protect them. I'm not talking physically protecting them- I'm talking about protecting their hearts and minds. And teaching them how to protect their own hearts and minds. I've really prayed for wisdom in this area. And the Lord has shown me that there are things that we have been doing, have been watching, have been listening to that could plant little seeds in their heart and grow into things that he doesn't want there. Most of this comes through watching TV. I've become very protective over what they are watching. We've cut way back on how much we watch and we've stopped watching things we've watched previously. They don't like it, but right now, it's what I need to do to protect their hearts. 6. Stop being a hypocrite. I'm not saying that Aaron and I lead vastly different lives in private than we do in public, because we don't. But, I do instruct my girls to do things that I don't do. Or not as quickly or as easily as I should. They have to clean up their toys when they're done playing with them so why don't I clean up the mess I make in the kitchen as soon as I'm done. I want them to make their beds in the morning but I can't remember the last time I made mine. I can't teach and train my children in Biblical principles and instruction if I'm not living out that training myself. I want to be more like Christ, and I want my kids to learn about God and becoming more like him from me and what I do, not just what I say. Parenting has been the hardest thing I've ever done. Marriage has been exceedingly hard and parenting has surpassed that easily. It has exposed my selfishness in a way I never thought possible. God has used my children to peel back layers and expose things about myself that I didn't even know existed. But I'm so thankful for that. I want my kids to know Jesus by seeing him in my life and if that means dealing with ugly things, then that's what it means. Are there any parenting goals you want to set for yourself or have been working on lately? I'd love to hear them! Happy Tuesday!
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My Christmas mantle came down with my Christmas decorations. Since then, it's been a sad sight. I left a few of the candles up because I wasn't sure if I was going to use them or not with the next mantle. The Christmas picture never got changed because well, I haven't done anything. Then it became a shelf for stacked DVD cases. I decided that I would just skip over a "winter" mantle and just go straight to a Valentine's Day mantle. I've had a little trouble brainstorming up a few ideas, but I have decided that I wanted to go in a totally different direction than I did with last years Valentine's Day Mantle. I'm still playing around with a few ideas, but I wanted to share a few of the printables I've made as possible options for this year's mantle. They are all free for download, just click on the picture or title. You Are My Sunshine Conversation Heart Print_ Ombre Bushel & A Peck Printable_ I still haven't decided if I'm using one of these, but I hope that you might be able to! I love the fun of Valentine's Day. As soon as I get my mantle put together, I'll have pictures up ASAP! Happy Wednesday!! It's Monday again! After an extended Christmas break due to weather, I had a hard time getting my head back into the school game. I've been so used to waking up with no agenda for the day. It didn't dawn on me until late yesterday and I needed clothes and lunch ready for Emmy. She's excited to see her friends and teacher again though. And I'm ready for routine! Last week my menu had dinners that were all at least 80% "clean". Moving to a more clean/whole diet is something I've wanted to do for a while, but it seemed overwhelming. I came across a 2 week menu on Pinterest and it was very doable looking. So, I planned our dinners around some of the recipes I saw on the plan. I did the same thing this week. The meals are at least 80% clean, as some of them don't include all organic ingredients. I planned through Thursday. My grocery shopping day is Friday and my menu usually starts over then. Monday- Meatloaf, mashed potatoes, and spinach and cranberry salad. Tuesday- Chicken stir-fry and brown rice. Wednesday- Nachos/ Taco Salad Thursday- Chicken and cheese quesadillas, steamed mixed veggies. It's all pretty simple. I'll be using ground turkey for the Meatloaf and the Nachos/Taco Salad. It felt good last week to cook things from scratch. It left me feeling very satisfied with the meals I was preparing. And it felt good giving my family good healthy food. I'm going to try and continue to integrate healthy changes into our diet. Verse of the Week Aaron and I had the opportunity to head out to lunch today. It was a good time for us to be able to spend some time together and laugh and talk. We had a good opportunity to talk about the areas in our lives and in our marriage we need to trust God more. The area's that we've realized we're not being totally faithful to him. I love being able to have open honest relationships like that with the postman. But, in light of that conversation, I've chosen Psalm 9:10 as the verse of the week. Aaron and I are in a very unsure place. I feel like we're living in a fluid situation. We're just waiting for the Lord to say go, and we'll pick and go wherever that might be. But until then, we are trying to make sure we're doing the most we can do to continue being faithful to become more like him. I know that the Lord will never abandon us, He's promised us a hope and a future. But, I do believe that if we search for Him earnestly, we will never question his presence in the waiting.
Remember today that the more you search for him, the more you will find him. God does not hide from us. He does not play games. If you seek you will find. If you trust, he will catch. He will catch even if you don't truth. Because that's who he is. And that's how much he loves you. Happy Monday! We've left the house once in almost 7 days. Between snow and frozen weather, it was just best to stay inside. And I'm not going to lie, it was H-A-R-D. It was hard because my girls can handle it for about 2 days without wanting to crawl up the walls. It was hard because if I don't interact with other people for a few days, I feel tired and drained. It was hard because I was stressed out about Aaron out delivering mail in -40 degree weather. It was just plain hard. We played, we danced, we sang, we playdo'd, we painted, we made stuff, we played games. We made a snowman on the 1 day it wasn't too cold to even step foot outside. And I was cranky. And mean. And tired. And lazy. And ashamed. And regretful. Why can't I just be nice to my kids? Why can't I just keep my house clean? We're not doing anything to distract me from it. Why can't I just wake up? I feel like such a slob. Life is so terrible. God, what are you doing?! I battled all day today. We went out for a little while this afternoon and it was nice to get out, but it didn't fix things like I'd hoped it would. Then I realized something... Satan loves isolation. When we are alone, feeling run down, and beaten down, and negative, he's going to be right there, willing to hold our hands and skip straight down that ugly path. And I've let him do it for 5 days. He knows my weakness. He knows that if one little lie gets planted, I'll grow it into a grandmother willow tree all by myself. He knows that about me. He knows exactly how to use 10 days of isolation. He wanted me to come out of this feeling beat down, shamed, and worthless. He wanted me to feel defeated as a mom and as a wife. He handed me his fiddle and I played it. And ya know what? There wasn't a whole lot I could do about being stuck in the house. I wasn't taking my girls out into the arctic weather. Nobody was coming here. But it got me thinking that a lot of times there are ways we isolate ourselves when it is in our control. We isolate ourselves when we don't attend church. I will NEVER tell anyone to not go to church or find a church to get involved in. Not every church is for everyone, it may take a while to find the right church. And being involved in a church body means you've gotta just deal with folks. There's always good and bad because we're human. But if you're going to grow spiritually, you've gotta be in a Church community with other Christians. And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near. Hebrews 10:25 We isolate ourselves to hide sin. When I was trying to hide my affair, I avoided my friends. I avoided church activities. I avoided the people who loved me and knew me well. I didn't want them to see that I was hiding something. When we are alone, sinning is easy. And when we want to continue sinning, we hide. But we can not hide forever. Eventually, our sin will be brought to light. But if you fail to keep your word, then you will have sinned against the Lord, and you may be sure that your sin will find you out. Numbers 32:23 We isolate ourselves out of fear. If we were honest with ourselves and sat down to make a list of the things we were afraid of, especially regarding community with other christians, I think the list would be extensive. I've got a handful of extremely close Godly friends and I still get worried about what they think of me as a person, as a mom, as a Christian. And the truth is this- we have nothing to fear. The more we cut ourselves off from others the more afraid of them we become! And that's just silly. God knows every single thing about us. Every single thing. There's nothing we can hide from him. There's nothing that we don't share with him. And he loves us anyways. Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love. 1 John 4:18 So now what? We've talked about a few ways we isolate ourselves which can allow sin to grow, but what now?
Open your Bible. The more light you shine into your life the less darkness there will be. The more you know Jesus, the sooner you'll recognize those lies that satan tries to feed us. The more you know of God's character the more you'll understand just an ounce of his immeasurable love. I have to admit, I was really bad about doing this the last few days. The first problem that led to my Snowmageddon downfall. Memorize scripture. There will be times that you won't be able to run to your Bible and flip it open and read some verses. Memorize it. Know it well. That way you can easily recall it when you need it in those times. The Bible isn't called the Sword of the Spirit for nothing. It's powerful. It's truth is powerful. Get to know some folks. If you don't go to church, stop making excuses and find one. Yes, you feel like God is anywhere and you can commune with Him in nature. Good, do it after church. God NEVER intended for us to do this alone. We see that in the first few chapters of the Bible. He created Eve for Adam so he wouldn't be alone. He found 12 disciples to teach and serve with so he wasn't alone. DON'T BE ALONE!! Like I said, there are circumstances when you're going to be alone. For 5 days. With just your children. Watching it snow. Circumstances like this are unavoidable. But that's why it's important to equip yourself properly. I didn't, and I paid for it. Don't hide. Don't be afraid. Don't isolate yourself. Don't let Satan write the narrative for your day, your week, your month, years- whatever. Happy Friday! Sweet snow freedom! Well, we're living in a winter wonderland! Went to bed at about midnight last night with not a flake of snow on the ground and here we are 15 hours later with like 5 or 6 inches. Snow everywhere. And it just keeps snowing! So, since we're stuck inside today and I've got some free time, I decided to do a post with one of the printables I've made for around my house. Feel free download it for your use! They picture is linked for download. Just click on it. This is one of my most favorites. It's hanging in our upstairs bathroom, matted with striped wrapping paper, and in a bright yellow frame. It's so fun. I figured it was an appropriate verse for our bathroom. Plus, I think it's appropriate for the current weather conditions!
Enjoy the printable and stay warm if you're getting loads of snow! 2014! What the what?! Man, that happened fast. Seriously, it seems like just yesterday was 2000. All the Y2K drama. I guess my point is that time flies! 2013 was a year of anticipation for me. Aaron and I entered the year running head on into fixing our marriage, a brand new job for the Post Man, and excitement that finally we'd be debt free, healthy, and happy. I knew that we had no where to go but up, and I knew that God would show us his love and faithfulness in new ways. God led me to Ephesians 3:20-21 as my theme verse for 2013. Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. Glory to him in the church and in Christ Jesus through all generations forever and ever! Amen. All I can say is that God proved those verses to us over and over again. He provided for us- physically, mentally, emotionally, financially. Over and over again. And yet, the last few days as I've been seriously thinking about putting down my new goals and theme verse(s) on paper, all I can think about is where I've failed this last year. The goals I set for myself that I did not meet. I started getting discouraged that I, not only didn't lose weight, but I gained. I can't say my house has stayed any cleaner in 2013 than all the years before. We became debt free early in 2013 and then accrued debt again. All these failures have clouded my vision and created so much white noise I was having a hard time concentrating on getting new goals down for this year. All I was hearing was "why make goals when you don't reach them"? I mentioned it briefly on Facebook and a friend suggested I use the word "focus" as a theme this year. I'd already been praying about Philippians 1:10 as theme verse and as soon as I read what she mentioned, it was like a light bulb went on. So... in 2014 my them word is- "Focus" And my theme verse is Philippians 1:10 (NLT)- For I want you to understand what really matters, so that you may live pure and blameless lives until the day of Christ’s return. Last year was about change. It was about moving forward, it was about God's love, grace, and redemption. 2014 is going to be about focusing my eyes on the cross. It's going to be about seeking out and asking God to show me what really matters. To shed the things that are holding me back from living more like Jesus every day. I want nothing more than to be able to live a pure and blameless life before God. I know that means starting out the year not focusing on the failures of last year, but on the fact that God has given me another day to work towards the new goals I'll set. Through his strength.
Once I have my list of goals completed, maybe I'll get them up so you can see them. I'm still praying about the place this blog has in my life right now. It was quickly becoming something it shouldn't have been- a time consuming point of comparison to the rest of the blogosphere out there. It was stressing me out and stealing my joy. When (or if) God gives me the correct focus and direction for the blog again (and I can carve out the time) I'll be back. Happy New Year! |
HEY, I'M JESSICA!
Christian. Wife. Mommy. Daughter. Pastor. Friend. Saved.Redeemed. Beloved.
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