It's been a long time since I've blogged! It hasn't seemed like that long, but wow! We had a great week or so with my folks and a quick weekend getaway for me and the postman! We had a great time relaxing in Amish country in Northern Indiana! It was so nice to have time away. We haven't taken a trip together alone since we've had kids (over 4 yrs). We've gone on trips with the youth groups we were working with, but that technically doesn't count. This was just us, with absolutely no agenda. And it was awesome. Hard to come home. So thankful for the work God has done in our marriage. A year ago, a trip like this would have been unheard of. Not because we couldn't, but because we wouldn't have wanted to! Now I'm ready to pack up and do it again this weekend! And on another note, my big girl turned 4! It's honestly been the 4 fastest years of my life! And she finished her first year of preschool. Where does the time go!? So, last Friday marked the start of our summer vacation. This week was somewhat eaten up by the holiday and family still here. Our first free days was yesterday and we spent the day relaxing and, well, napping... Summer Break is hard! But with the beginning of summer comes a great opportunity to set some goals for the next few months! So, here are a few of the goals I've set for myself and our family for Summer break!
- Paint my bedroom furniture. I've been thinking about this for some time and I just need to pull the trigger on it. Our bedroom furniture is a hodge podge of wood colors and types, so I'm going all white. Nice and crisp and uniform. Adding the same hardware to everything will help too! - Make better use of our family zoo passes. My parents got us zoo passes for the year as a part of the girls birthday gifts. Last year they did the same and we went about 5 times. I plan to go much more often this year. - Organize and edit every room. I've been saying for a while that we don't have much to sell in a upcoming family garage sale, but I'm pretty sure if I was honest and adopted a little more of a simplistic view (especially in my kitchen) I'd be able to find plenty of stuff. So, over the next few weeks I'm planning on going through our entire house and getting rid of stuff I've held onto for way too long! - Send out more greeting cards. Years ago when I was a teenager and in college, my friends and I sent each other lots of cards. I loved the feeling of getting something hand written in the mail. I don't do it enough now. I'm going to try and send out at least 2 cards a week this summer. - Read 5 books. I LOVE to read. To the point that I have a hard time putting a book down and end up staying up most of the night to finish it type love. But, I have a harder time reading non fiction books. I know there are so many good ones out there (we own lots of them) so my plan is to read at least 3 non fiction books and 2 fiction books this summer. - 2 TV free nights a week. This is more specifically for Aaron and I. It's easy for us to plop on the couch after a long day and tune out. But, now that it's warmer out, it would be so easy for us to plop down outside and spend time together actually conversing instead of staring at the tv. - Memorize more scripture. I want to do 3 verses with my girls. One a month. And I want to memorize 12 new verses. I've slacked off over the last few weeks, so next week, I'm back at it! So, that's my short list. I'm sure I'll come up with more. What are some of your goals for this summer?
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What a great weekend we had! Yesterday we were able to get our family pictures taken and I'm so excited about seeing how they turned out! The menu this week is going to be a little short. I only planned meals for Monday and Tuesday as my parents will be here on Wednesday and we'll be figuring out a meal plan for the rest of their visit once they get here. So, here's the menu for this week... Monday- Spaghetti and Meatballs. I use whole wheat spaghetti usually and today I'll be using the leftover turkey meatballs from the veggie mac and meatballs from last week. Tuesday- Chicken Enchiladas. This got bumped from the menu last week and it's one of my favorites so I'm doing it this week. Plus, I have all the ingredients for it still. No need to buy anything for it. I did go grocery shopping, but I only needed to pick up a few staples- things that Aaron uses every day for his lunch and things like that. I spent a total of $19 on groceries for this week. Obviously, because it's a rather short week of planning, that made a difference. Verse of the Week I haven't gone back and looked to verify (and let's just be honest, I barely remember what I wore yesterday), but I'm pretty sure this was the verse of the week a month or so ago. But, it's more of a theme verse this week than a memory verse. The theme for our lives recently has been hurry up and wait. So, I have to just keep reminding myself that God is working even when we can't see or can't tell. And also that God wastes nothing- waiting time is never wasted time. I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.”- Lamentations 3:24
The Lord is my portion. Get's me every time. We may not be able to see the path ahead of us or control circumstances, but that's ok, because God is enough. He's enough so I will wait. And knowing he is enough makes it possible for me to wait. Redundant? Yes, maybe. But that's truly the point. Be hopeful this Monday knowing that God is enough. And because He is enough, you can wait. And not only can you wait, but you can rest in the fact that your waiting isn't pointless waiting! Yesterday was one of those days where things come to a screeching halt. Everything just stops. It seems like an eternity, but it's really only a minute. I'm not going to go into details about the situation as there are still aspects of it that we're dealing with, but it was one of those times when it's rubber meeting the road of our faith. But what I can say in the midst of all the chaos is this... I'm so glad that I serve a God that loves me and I'm so thankful I've been memorizing scripture. After I got over the initial freak out crisis moment, my mind was flooded with verse after verse about God's love, faithfulness, and provision. But it was this verse that stuck with me... The situation we were faced with yesterday could have been potentially devastating to our family. And we had no control over the outcome. There was not a single thing we could do except pray to be accepting of God's will and trust in his bigger plan. And after I prayed those things, I was filled with a peace I've never known before. To the point that in the midst of the chaos, all I could do was praise God for his love and his faithfulness to me and our family. It's something I've never experienced. I can honestly say this was the first time I've ever been able to "praise God in the storm". It was as if I could do nothing else. I was overwhelmed with a sense of love and thankfulness towards God.
In the 6 years Aaron and I have been together, we've been forced over and over again to trust God. We've been so totally out of control of so many situations that we've had nothing else to do but trust. And he's proven himself faithful time and time again. I'm finally coming to a point where God is the first person I turn to instead of the last. And because of that, yesterday I was able to say... God's got this. He hasn't failed us yet, and today isn't going to be any different. Even if the outcome isn't what I'd choose, there's a bigger picture. And this didn't surprise him. He wasn't caught off guard by this and whatever happens the day after and the day after, He knows all that too. And he's there waiting for us. If you don't know God, or you don't know him in a way that's deep and intimate, message me. Find another Christian, a pastor, someone. Ask them to tell you about God. About who he is and why he loves you so much. My desire for you is that when you're faced with a stressful, potentially devastating, totally out of your control situation, you can know that it's ok. It's not out of control. God's got it. He's got you. And he always will because he loves you beyond what you can fathom. I want you to know that God. And he wants to know you. For some reason, 4:30 am today wasn't as bad as last week. But, I felt a little thrown off because I tossed my workout clothes in the dryer last night and they weren't dry this morning, so I spent some extra time hunting down more clothes. Then, I got caught in traffic on the way to the Y. At 5 am. When I finally got there, the trainer girl took our measurements. To my dismay, I've lost a half inch in the last 4 weeks. A loss is a loss, I know that, but I know what I'm capable of, and a half inch isn't it. Then, we started our work out. It didn't seem bad this week, oh but we were fooled. Our workout was all on or next to the treadmill this week which I actually kind of liked.
*5 mins on treadmill at 3.5 and 10% incline *Medicine Ball squats- 20 lb medicine ball, squat until your butt hits the end of the treadmill. - 20x *Push Press- 20 lb medicine ball, push out and then press up. 20x *Plank- 30 sec *Push Up on the treadmill. Place feet on the outside of the belt and hands on the inside bars. Complete push ups while keeping elbows as close to the ribs as possible. 20X *Burpees- All the way to the floor. 10x *5 mins on treadmill at 3.5 and 10% incline -Repeat for 1 hr. Trainer girl didn't realize she had us walking for 5 mins at the start and finish of the workout, so we actually ended up walking for 10 mins each time which was a bit of a welcome break even though it was straight uphill. This workout was different in that I feel like my arms, shoulders, and chest did most of the work. Normally I feel like it's the lower half of my body that is worked most. I can already barely lift my arms over my head. Should be an interesting day! I have 2 more weeks left of this class. They are starting another 14 week session right after this one is over. I really want to do it, but it's kind of expensive. I'll have to see how our budget is looking before I can even consider it. Today is a busy day for us! Excited to enjoy this beautiful weather we're having here in Indy! Heading to the park for a picnic lunch! Hope you enjoy your day as well! Aaron and I have been in and out of "ministry" and ministries for the last 6 years. Longer than that if you include the ministry we each did before we started dating and got married. I always had a perception of what it meant to be "in ministry"- being a pastor, being a pastors wife, and being a parsonage family.
Now for those of you who's heads are already spinning, I'll lay it out like this- being "in ministry" just usually means that you hold some sort of title as a pastor within in a church. Although, it's definitely possible to be in ministry and not hold any sort of official position. Doing any sort of service or volunteer work is ministry at your church. Cooking dinner for a friend or family member is ministry. Just loving people as Jesus would love them is ministry. But, for all intents and purposes, this blog is about the "official, title holding, on staff at a church" ministry. And a parsonage is the typical name for a house that the "in ministry" family lives in. I grew up in church. My parents were always very involved and held leadership positions within the church. Because of this, they were always fairly close with the parsonage family. We spent lots of time with our pastors and pastor's wives. I have fond memories of all of them, and am thankful for each of them and the influence they had on my life. But now that I've been a pastor's wife and a parsonage occupant, I've realized what and who I perceived them to be was totally off. These are the few of the observations and truths I've come to know over the last 6-10 years: 1. Pastors don't live in a suit. Funny as it is, I had this perception that my pastors got up in the morning, put on a coat and tie, and headed out for the day. All day. Every day. I remember being shocked the first time I saw one of my pastors in shorts doing non church things. The truth is- Pastors love their church and the people inside the church, but they do have a life that happens outside of the 4 walls of the church building. They have to. Just as you need a break from your work, or some down time- Pastors need it too. Obviously, there are exceptions- emergencies (legit ones), but PLEASE let your pastor have a life and have some free time especially when it's with his family! 2. Pastors (and their spouses) are humans. Please realize that just because your pastor can get up and preach the most spirit filled sermon on Sunday morning that doesn't mean he is above or free of struggle. He gets tired, he gets frustrated. He probably really wants to ignore the 100th phone call of the day. The pastor's wife locks herself in the bathroom to get a break from her children (I wouldn't know a single thing about that), she's probably lost her cool with her kids in public, and she's ducked into the fitting room at Target to avoid "that person". Love them, respect them, but don't hold them to a standard that, as a human being, they can't keep. One day they will do something you don't like and you will be hurt by the extreme expectation you have placed on them. Be fair to yourself and be fair to us. 3. Pastors don't know everything. I feel like your pastor should come with a disclaimer- Just because I graduated from such and such school(s) and potentially have a certain number of degrees that add letters to my name doesn't mean that I can answer every question or solve every problem that you have. And it doesn't mean that I can pick up a phone and call God to handle all of your issues immediately. Sometimes, the best your pastor can do is put his arm around your shoulders, cry with you, and share in your pain. Pastors are people that God has called to teach others about himself and his word. People that God has called to lead his Church- to shepherd them, to love them, and to hold their hands along the path of life. Sometimes the expectation of being a miracle working problem solver seems like an insurmountable wall that Pastors can't climb. Don't build that wall for your pastor. There is a good chance that he holds himself to a rather high standard to begin with. Don't make his ministry feel impossible. 4. Pastor's Wives don't fall directly from the June Cleaver tree. Being a pastor's wife is as much of a calling as being a Pastor. That may be hard for some to understand, but essentially, you are accepting the same challenges and sacrifices as your spouse and you have to be happy about it! My worst fear as a pastor's wife (when we were a parsonage family) was that someone would drop by unexpectedly on the day my children got out of bed on the crazy side, my unfolded laundry was piled on the couch, and dishes were filling the sink. The pressures that you feel in keeping your house, raising obedient polite children, looking put together, and essentially having it all together- add even more expectation from every smiling face that fill the pews (or chairs) of your church and that is how your Pastor's wife mght feel. If you sense an air of frazzeldness, extend a hand or a hug. Offer to watch the kids for a few hours so she can take a bubble bath, or read a book, or go shopping, or fold laundry. Surprise your parsonage family with dinner (provided you call at least an hour in advance) or send your son over to cut their grass. Love on them. It will mean more than you know. 5. You are loved. Pastors celebrate your births and cry at your losses. They enjoy getting to see your successes, and they pray you through your struggles. They appreciate you trusting them with your children, your teenagers, your wives, your husbands. You become family. It may be a hard thing for your pastor, youth pastor, or children's pastor to express to each and every person, but you are loved with a love that only God can give a shepherd. We worry, we lament, and we rejoice because we love you. And because we want you to know that God loves you more than we ever could. Obviously, none of this is scientific and it's also generalized. There are lots of pastors and pastor's wives that might disagree with these things. (They do wear suits all the time and they wouldn't dream of using the lock on the bathroom door). But these are just a few of the things that I've lived, experienced, and sentiments that have been shared by other folks "in ministry". I'm willing to put money on the fact that your pastor (and spouse) would appreciate hearing how loved they are on any day of the week, not just once a year or on holidays. Take a minute to send your Pastor a card, and email, or a text, or order some pizza for them for dinner. Just thank them for all they do (and lovingly put up with!). Beautiful Spring! I've always said fall was my favorite season but it seems that every spring I decide that spring is my favorite instead. I love the beauty of growth. Of newness. I love when what seemed like nothing becomes something. The flowers peaking up out of the hard cold ground, leaves popping out of the gray looking tree branches, birds, baby ducks, life. What a great reminder of God's love! Ok, end tangent. On to the menu for this week. I got tired of the same ole, same ole. I seemed to have fallen in a rut with my menus and I was wanting something new. So, I dug out my cookbooks. (I actually didn't get one single meal from pinterest this week!) I am doing some basics and a few new things as well! I've updated my menu section so I'll link up the new recipes! Monday- Mac and Cheese with Broccoli and Turkey Meatballs. I'm always one for some good comfort food. This looked awesome with the meatballs and broccoli thrown in. I'm interested to see how the cheese sauce turns out. I'll report back! Tuesday- Chicken Pot Pie- Continue with the comfort food. This is always a family favorite and honestly, pretty easy! Although, I pre bake the biscuits because I do NOT like raw biscuits! Wednesday- Taco's- Wednesday is a busy night, so Taco's are an easy fix and a family pleaser! Thursday- Chicken Enchiladas- I love love love this recipe. Plus, it's a "skinny" recipe. So good! Friday- Friday is date night for us with some friends, so the girls will probably just have nuggets while we're out! Saturday- Pizza- Homemade pizza and movie night! Sunday- Ranch Pork. A pretty common recipe in our house, although, I'm using a different cut of pork, so we'll see how it turns out! I love that this is a crock pot meal and all I'll have to do when we get home is fix the mashed potatoes and veggies! Well, there ya have it. We'll see if it really works out that way this week! It seems like there is always sandwiches subbed somewhere! This morning I read a devotional on living where you live. Putting your roots down in today and not living a shallow life waiting for tomorrow. I don't necessarily feel like I've been shallow in my relationships with family and friends, but I definitely do feel like I've become focused on what is ahead of us. And the truth is, when it's time, God will show us that. Whatever it may be. I might miss opportunities I've got today if I'm trained so hard on tomorrow! 2 Peter 3:9- The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to parish, but everyone to come to repentance.
For a control freak like me, it's hard to trust that God knows the bigger picture. And that he knows what's best for me and when it's best for me. This week I'm going to commit to trust every day to God. To trust him and his timing in my life and in the life of my family. Happy Monday! Over the last week, I've been pretty frustrated. Actually, a little longer than that, but it's sort of peaked this past week. I've been frustrated that my house has been a mess, my children seem to be all sorts of crazy, I've only worked out 3 times, and the last time I updated my blog was 9 days ago. And yet I can barely seem to keep my eyes open by 4pm. About a month ago I decided that if I wanted to be a certain type of person, I just needed to do the same things those certain types of people did. If I want to have a totally clean and organized house, then I just needed to stay on top of every dish and piece of laundry. If I wanted my children to behave in public then I needed to try all sorts of different forms of creative discipline. If I want to have effective and efficient workouts, I needed to be in the gym before 7 am every day. If I want to keep on top of my blog than I need to create planning charts and create a posting cache weeks in advance. None of that stuff is bad. In fact, it's all great stuff. And there are people who do it very successfully. Those people are not me. At least not the whole list at once. I got into this mindset where I was thinking - ok, if I want to be this person, then I've just gotta do this stuff. But don't screw up. If you screw up you're not that person. And you shouldn't need to screw up if you just do this stuff. It's a ridiculously disappointing pattering of thinking. It's not healthy. It's not possible. And it's not Christlike. So, here I sat feeling like a big heap of failure on the couch at 4 pm, drinking my 2nd cup of coffee hoping to stay awake through the rest of the afternoon. And in the middle of my self imposed falling shortness, I came across another blog*. The whole blog was full of awesome and witty quips about parenting. It was good enough that I shared it on my personal Facebook page. But what really stuck out to me was this line... "...[A parent] Who asks God to help you to be a better version of the person that you actually are, not for more strength to be an ideal parent..." What?! A better version of myself?! Myself is a cluttered, tired, falling behind mess! Why would I just want that all polished up? Because I'm created in God's image. Not the sin filled part, but the person part. The person God sees when he looks at me. God didn't create us to wallow in laziness. But he also didn't create us to live in constant frustration. So, I've decided that there are 2 solutions to this problem. #1- Ask God to show me what the truth is. Who He sees me as. Not the mess, not the frustration, but his child that he loves. And once he shows me that, believing it. Not getting bogged down in my own feelings of unworthiness. And #2- make a plan. I've been trying to be more diligent about creating a weekly schedule. Every day, creating a schedule of what and when. I keep my calendar on my phone, but that doesn't always help me. Spending a little time being more prepared. I read a quote yesterday that was like a "Yes! Thank You!" type thing... The best preparation for tomorrow is the right use of today.- Unknown Maybe you've been feeling frustrated and overwhelmed too. You're not alone. I think more people feel that way than would admit. Especially the folks we assume have it all together. Please remember that God doesn't look at you and see your mess, or your missed workouts, or your *feeling* of failure at parenting your children. He sees his child. One he loves more than we could ever understand. Don't get caught up in the lies I have been getting caught up in- that my worth and value is in the cleanliness quotient of my house or the number of workouts I get in during a week. Embrace a some of that freedom, take a minute to breathe, and then create a plan that will lessen your stress! Have A Great Friday! * The blog I mentioned is "To the Parents of Small Children...." by Steve Weins. You can find this blog at his websitewww.SteveWeins.com.
My theme for Wednesdays now is coffee and ibuprofen. Getting up at 4:30 am is getting increasingly harder the longer this class goes on. But, I love how I feel when I'm done. I think I'm slowly uncovering my inner athlete. Pushing myself to finish the workouts is hard, but I refuse to be a quitter.
Last Sunday, we had a guest speaker at church because our pastor was on vacation. He used a Ralph Waldo Emerson quote in his message that I love... "Sow a thought and you reap an action; sow an action and you reap a habit; sow a habit and you reap a character; sow a character and you reap a destiny." It hit me how much that applies to this weight loss journey that I'm on. Every decision I make sows a seed. Every choice has a ripple effect and helps paint a bigger picture. I may not think that choosing not to eat that cookie or drink that pop doesn't make a huge difference in the grand scheme of things, but in reality- it does. Because it isn't necessarily about the calories, it's about my character. So, just a little food for thought this morning. No pun intended! Class today wasn't brutal like last week, but it was tough. My back was bothering me going into it so I had to modify some of the exercises. And I made mention of my knee hurting some while I was doing squats, so Trainer Girl had me stop doing squats and had me start doing kettle ball pulls. When she gave us our workout sheet it was just a short list which is deceivingly encouraging. But it's always the short lists that get ya! I weighed in before class started, and wouldn't ya know... I lost 8 oz. (Insert surprised eye roll here) Frustrating. But I'm hoping that dropping my calories this week will make a difference! I'm eating 1550 calories now instead of 1800. The same thing has happened this time around as last. 1800 is just below my maintain calorie count, so I haven't been losing anything. Dropping just 250 calories makes a big difference. I'm expecting to see around a 1.5 loss a week. I'm still tracking my food, but Trainer Girl now wants weekly emails of my food tracking. Eek! Better clean that up a little! I haven't taken any measurements in 3 weeks, so I'm interested to see how much that has changed. I can tell there has been changes based on how my clothes are fitting, but it's always nice to actually see the numbers on the paper. I'll see if trainer girl will take them next week. Ok, so here's workout #3! Phase 1- 1st set, 10 reps; 2nd set, 15 reps; 3rd set, 20 reps. Be consistent with no breaks. Burpees Mt. Climbers Jumping Jacks Treadmill- 3.0 at 10% for 3 mins Phase 2- 1st set, 10 reps; 2nd set, 15 reps; 3rd set, 20 reps. Be consistent with no breaks. Kettle Ball Squats Push Ups Walk Outs - Bend at waist so your hands are touching the ground, keep knees straight and walk hands forward until you're in a plank position. Walk hands backwards to feet and stand up straight. Treadmill 3.0 at 10% for 3 mins Repeat both phases until you've completed an hour workout. (I did it twice) It's a good workout for sure. Even with all the modifications I did, I still feel like my body has been worked! So, now it's onto that coffee and Ibuprofen! Have a great Wednesday! |
HEY, I'M JESSICA!
Christian. Wife. Mommy. Daughter. Pastor. Friend. Saved.Redeemed. Beloved.
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